Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-979DD984-20260327
The AI service has recovered. The employee may return to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude Console User
Unable to work due to Claude Console outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Mild frustration symptoms due to increased AI service latency. Patient is irritably drumming fingers on the desk. (Affected service: Claude Console — Claude.ai and Claude login down)
🔮 Prognosis
Recovery complete. Patient has regained access to their AI tool and can stop pretending to work manually.
Issuing Physician
Dr. Claudia Timeout
Specialist for AI Outage Syndromes
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
March 27, 2026
21:34 UTC
Certificate #SB-979DD984-20260327
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.