Official Document

Medical Sick Note

Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage

SB-036E26AC-20260607

🔴

AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.

🤖

Employee / Patient

Claude API User

Unable to work due to Claude API outage (Anthropic) — View service page


🩺 Diagnosis

Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected service: Claude API — Elevated errors on Claude Opus 4.7)

🔮 Prognosis

Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. Until then: Netflix.


Issuing Physician

Dr. Claudia Timeout

Specialist for AI Outage Syndromes

Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity

Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute

Date of Issuance

June 07, 2026

14:39 UTC

Certificate #SB-036E26AC-20260607

Certified

SICK

Sorry-Boss.com

This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.