Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-7E4AFC07-20260408
The AI service has recovered. The employee may return to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude Console User
Unable to work due to Claude Console outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Claude Console — Elevated errors on Claude.ai, API, Claude Code)
🔮 Prognosis
The AI service is back online. Patient is already showing early signs of productivity. Full work capacity expected within minutes.
Issuing Physician
Dr. Packet Loss
Specialist for Technology-Induced Work Incapacity
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
April 08, 2026
17:56 UTC
Certificate #SB-7E4AFC07-20260408
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.