Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-49E4B74B-20260929
AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude Console User
Unable to work due to Claude Console outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected service: Claude Console — Elevated errors on claude.ai, Claude Code, Claude Cowork and the Claude API)
🔮 Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every 30 seconds.
Issuing Physician
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
September 29, 2026
14:30 UTC
Certificate #SB-49E4B74B-20260929
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.