Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-320A3E6C-20260409
AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude API User
Unable to work due to Claude API outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Mild frustration symptoms due to increased AI service latency. Patient is irritably drumming fingers on the desk. (Affected service: Claude API — Sonnet 4.6 elevated rate of errors)
🔮 Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. Until then: Netflix.
Issuing Physician
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
April 09, 2026
08:11 UTC
Certificate #SB-320A3E6C-20260409
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.