Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-681AE492-20260725
The AI service has recovered. The employee may return to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude API User
Unable to work due to Claude API outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Minor productivity loss — AI is working at snail speed, patient is considering taking the rest of the day off. (Affected service: Claude API — Sonnet 4.6 and Sonnet 5 errors elevated)
🔮 Prognosis
AI service has been restored. Patient may gradually return to work. A 2-hour grace period is recommended.
Issuing Physician
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
July 25, 2026
18:18 UTC
Certificate #SB-681AE492-20260725
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.