Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-F79FA255-20260814
AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.
Employee / Patient
Claude Code User
Unable to work due to Claude Code outage (Anthropic) — View service page
🩺 Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Claude Code — Service disruption on Claude Code on the web and related services)
🔮 Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. Until then: Netflix.
Issuing Physician
Dr. Server Crash
Specialist for AI-dependent Work Disorders
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
August 14, 2026
00:45 UTC
Certificate #SB-F79FA255-20260814
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.