Official Document

Medical Sick Note

Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage

SB-954999DE-20261025

🔴

AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.

🤖

Employee / Patient

Claude API User

Unable to work due to Claude API outage (Anthropic) — View service page


🩺 Diagnosis

Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected service: Claude API — Elevated errors for Claude Fable 5.1)

🔮 Prognosis

The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back online. We recommend patience and snacks.


Issuing Physician

Prof. Dr. Error 503

Chief of the Productivity Loss Department

Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity

Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute

Date of Issuance

October 25, 2026

08:25 UTC

Certificate #SB-954999DE-20261025

Certified

SICK

Sorry-Boss.com

This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.