Official Document
Medical Sick Note
Certificate of Incapacity for Work due to AI Outage
SB-5E101D67-20260415
AI is still down. The employee remains unable to work.
🩺 Diagnosis
Minor productivity loss — AI is working at snail speed, patient is considering taking the rest of the day off. (Affected service: ChatGPT — ChatGPT FedRAMP workspaces not loading)
🔮 Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question until the AI is back online.
Issuing Physician
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Specialist for AI-related Work Incapacity
Sorry-Boss.com Medical Institute
Date of Issuance
April 15, 2026
18:41 UTC
Certificate #SB-5E101D67-20260415
Certified
SICK
Sorry-Boss.com
This is a satirical document generated by Sorry-Boss.com. It is not a real medical certificate. But let's be honest — can you really work without your AI? We rest our case.