Sick Notes Gallery
Official excuse notes for when your AI tools let you down
ChatGPT User
SB-EA02D972-20260511
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 11, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-CF67EB11-20260511
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
May 11, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-38D2D247-20260511
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Ch...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Dr. Claudia Timeout
Specialist for AI Outage Syndromes
Date
May 11, 2026
Claude Code User
SB-29B15EE8-20260509
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: Claude Code...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Null Pointer
Director of the Institute for AI Dependency
Date
May 09, 2026
Claude API User
SB-0800BA59-20260509
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Cl...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 09, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-7B68E192-20260509
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: ChatGPT — E...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
May 09, 2026
Claude Code User
SB-6CECF6F5-20260508
Diagnosis
Mild impairment of work performance due to slow AI responses. Patient shows early signs of impatience. (Affected service: Claude Code — C...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 08, 2026
Claude API User
SB-2E974A48-20260508
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
May 08, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-F870A97A-20260508
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 08, 2026
Claude API User
SB-B843EBC6-20260508
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Cl...
Prognosis
The AI service is back online. Patient is already showing early signs of prod...
Issued by
Dr. Packet Loss
Specialist for Technology-Induced Work Incapacity
Date
May 08, 2026
Claude API User
SB-FFFD7502-20260508
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
May 08, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-E13AD21F-20260508
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: ChatGPT — I...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
May 08, 2026
Claude API User
SB-BE233EC4-20260508
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Server Crash
Specialist for AI-dependent Work Disorders
Date
May 08, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-819B5066-20260507
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Ch...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
May 07, 2026
Claude API User
SB-820E0070-20260507
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: Claude API ...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Null Pointer
Director of the Institute for AI Dependency
Date
May 07, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-DC2603FC-20260507
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: ChatGPT — I...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Null Pointer
Director of the Institute for AI Dependency
Date
May 07, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-FC87E279-20260507
Diagnosis
Minor productivity loss — AI is working at snail speed, patient is considering taking the rest of the day off. (Affected service: GitHub ...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Server Crash
Specialist for AI-dependent Work Disorders
Date
May 07, 2026
Claude Code User
SB-64681568-20260506
Diagnosis
Minor productivity loss — AI is working at snail speed, patient is considering taking the rest of the day off. (Affected service: Claude ...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Dr. Packet Loss
Specialist for Technology-Induced Work Incapacity
Date
May 06, 2026
Claude API User
SB-340646B0-20260506
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
May 06, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-C5650145-20260506
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
May 06, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-4BCC7936-20260506
Diagnosis
Mild AI malaise — Patient occasionally has to think for themselves and is visibly overwhelmed by this. (Affected service: GitHub Copilot ...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
May 06, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-D40FE02C-20260506
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Gi...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
May 06, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-C01C8E11-20260505
Diagnosis
Minor productivity loss — AI is working at snail speed, patient is considering taking the rest of the day off. (Affected service: GitHub ...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Claudia Timeout
Specialist for AI Outage Syndromes
Date
May 05, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-C23671BE-20260505
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Gi...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
May 05, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-0CB316B9-20260504
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 04, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-3D9290BB-20260504
Diagnosis
Mild frustration symptoms due to increased AI service latency. Patient is irritably drumming fingers on the desk. (Affected service: Chat...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 04, 2026
Claude API User
SB-D6121BF7-20260504
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 04, 2026
Claude API User
SB-03D76A47-20260504
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Server Crash
Specialist for AI-dependent Work Disorders
Date
May 04, 2026
Claude API User
SB-5AB302AC-20260504
Diagnosis
Moderate work disruption — Patient is cursing uncontrollably at the screen and has consumed three coffees too many. (Affected service: Cl...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
May 04, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-A28BA00C-20260501
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: ChatGPT — Elevate...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Server Crash
Specialist for AI-dependent Work Disorders
Date
May 01, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-5961021A-20260501
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: ChatGPT — Elevate...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
May 01, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-719CB2F4-20260501
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
AI service has been restored. Patient may gradually return to work. A 2-hour ...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
May 01, 2026
Claude API User
SB-829EED81-20260430
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Packet Loss
Specialist for Technology-Induced Work Incapacity
Date
Apr 30, 2026
Claude.ai User
SB-8E3979E7-20260430
Diagnosis
Mild AI malaise — Patient occasionally has to think for themselves and is visibly overwhelmed by this. (Affected service: Claude.ai — cla...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 30, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-AD025C84-20260429
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: ChatGPT — Partial...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 29, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-43C381CD-20260429
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: ChatGPT — E...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 29, 2026
Claude API User
SB-7A865F3B-20260429
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude API — Elev...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
Apr 29, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-98DEE063-20260429
Diagnosis
Mild AI malaise — Patient occasionally has to think for themselves and is visibly overwhelmed by this. (Affected service: ChatGPT — ChatG...
Prognosis
AI service has been restored. Patient may gradually return to work. A 2-hour ...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
Apr 29, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-B1597CAD-20260429
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: ChatGPT — U...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Claudia Timeout
Specialist for AI Outage Syndromes
Date
Apr 29, 2026
Claude API User
SB-071378CE-20260428
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Packet Loss
Specialist for Technology-Induced Work Incapacity
Date
Apr 28, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-01ACD063-20260428
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: ChatGPT — Codex s...
Prognosis
Duration of incapacity: Indefinite. Productive work is out of the question un...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
Apr 28, 2026
Claude Code User
SB-F7AFA602-20260428
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
Apr 28, 2026
Claude.ai User
SB-C6AA3341-20260428
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: Claude.ai — Claud...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Null Pointer
Director of the Institute for AI Dependency
Date
Apr 28, 2026
Claude Code User
SB-EF6E9C94-20260428
Diagnosis
Mild AI malaise — Patient occasionally has to think for themselves and is visibly overwhelmed by this. (Affected service: Claude Code — C...
Prognosis
The AI service is back online. Patient is already showing early signs of prod...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
Apr 28, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-4D56DD00-20260428
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: GitHub Copi...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 28, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-22758B64-20260428
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: GitHub Copi...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Bit Missing
Senior Physician for Digital Withdrawal Symptoms
Date
Apr 28, 2026
ChatGPT User
SB-9D8AF618-20260428
Diagnosis
Partial AI withdrawal — Patient desperately attempts to complete tasks manually but fails miserably. (Affected service: ChatGPT — Elevate...
Prognosis
Expected return to work: Unclear. Patient is refreshing the status page every...
Issued by
Prof. Dr. Error 503
Chief of the Productivity Loss Department
Date
Apr 28, 2026
Claude API User
SB-2458AF66-20260428
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: Claude API ...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Cache Overflow
Specialist for Prompt Withdrawal
Date
Apr 28, 2026
Claude API User
SB-D4279FCD-20260428
Diagnosis
Advanced productivity loss — AI responds only sporadically, patient spends more time waiting than working. (Affected service: Claude API ...
Prognosis
Prognosis: Recovery possible only after full restoration of the AI service. U...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 28, 2026
GitHub Copilot User
SB-0E261D8B-20260427
Diagnosis
Significant impairment of work capacity due to unstable AI service. Patient is operating at only 10% of usual productivity. (Affected ser...
Prognosis
The patient will likely remain incapacitated until their AI tool is back onli...
Issued by
Dr. Rita Bootloop
Specialist for Chronic Tool Failures
Date
Apr 27, 2026